Mushroom

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Mushroom
Alias Mushroom
Title Court fool
Allegiances
Culture Crownlands
Born In before 103 AC[1]
Died In or after 157 AC[1]
Books

Mushroom was a dwarf fool at the courts of Viserys I Targaryen, Aegon II Targaryen, Rhaenyra Targaryen, and Aegon III Targaryen. He was believed to be a lackwit, which caused nobles to speak freely around him. His tales of plots, murders, trysts, and debaucheries were recorded in The Testimony of Mushroom by an unknown scribe.[2]

Appearance

Mushroom was three feet tall, with a very large head. He also claimed to have a large penis to match the size of his head.[2]

History

Mushroom made various claims, and is cited in several history books, where his record of events is included along with the views of somewhat more accurate historians. Septon Eustace's account often disputes many of his wild claims.[2][3][4]

Copies of The Testimony of Mushroom were burned on orders of King Baelor the Blessed,[5] but some survived the fires to be referred to in Archmaester Gyldayn's histories.[5][6]

The Reign of Viserys I

Mushroom wrote of what transpired during the reign of King Viserys I Targaryen. His accounts often conflicted with the records of Septon Eustace. An example of a claim made by Mushroom: he claimed Prince Daemon Targaryen took the maidenhead of Lady Alicent Hightower.[3] Mushroom also accused Prince Daemon of arranging the death of Ser Laenor Velaryon by paying his spurned lover, Ser Qarl Correy to kill him, thus making his niece, Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen, available for Daemon to marry.[3]

The Dance of the Dragons

Mushroom writings detail his own account of what happened during the civil war. He also asserts that he was the only one that Rhaenyra Targaryen came to completely trust.

The Regency of Aegon III

During the regency of Aegon III, Mushroom remained at court. He mocked Tessario as Tessario the Thumb in reference to the name of Lord Unwin Peake's personal guard, who Tessario commanded. When Lord Unwin arranged a Maiden' ball for King Aegon III to choose his own bride, Mushroom scorned the ball as the Maiden's Day Cattle Show.[7]

During the secret siege, Mushroom was within Maegor's Holdfast with King Aegon and Prince Viserys. When Lord Thaddeus Rowan, who had been tortured for days, was brought before the battlements and falsely confessed to the king and prince his involvement in a plot, it was soon clear to Viserys that Thaddeus had been broken by his experience and simply responded affirmatively when accused of anything, a point that was exemplified when Mushroom asked him if he poisoned King Viserys I, to which Thaddeus said he had.[8]

After the siege ended and the real conspirators were caught, Lord Rowan was reinstated in his post as a regent and King's Hand, but only for a moon's turn as it was soon clear to all he was no longer fit for the office. Mushroom continued to mock Thaddeus while he was at court, and once got him to confess to causing the Doom of Valyria. When King Aegon came of age and dismissed the regents and his Hand of the King, Lord Torrhen Manderly. Mushroom who had become fond of Lord Torrhen choose to leave court and accompany him to White Harbor, for Mushroom had no desire to stay for a king who never laughed and barely smiled.[9][8]

Later life

After spending time at the Merman's Court in White Harbor, Mushroom visited the Sealord's Palace in Braavos and Port of Ibben on the island of Ib. He also spent time amongst mummers of the Lisping Lady.[8]

Quotes

Joffrey: Mother, what if they kill Tyraxes?

Rhaenyra: They are vermin. Drunks and fools and gutter rats. One taste of dragonflame and they will run.

Mushroom: Drunks they may be, but a drunken man knows not fear. Fools, aye, but a fool can kill a king. Rats, that too, but a thousand rats can bring down a bear. I saw it happen once, down there in Flea Bottom.[4]

I mean to give the smallfolk peace and food and justice. If that will not suffice to win their love, let Mushroom make a progress.[9]

References

  1. 1.0 1.1 See the Mushroom calculation.
  2. 2.0 2.1 2.2 The World of Ice & Fire, The Targaryen Kings: Viserys I.
  3. 3.0 3.1 3.2 The Rogue Prince.
  4. 4.0 4.1 The Princess and the Queen.
  5. 5.0 5.1 The World of Ice & Fire, The Targaryen Kings: Baelor I.
  6. Fire & Blood, Heirs of the Dragon - A Question of Succession.
  7. Fire & Blood, Under the Regents - War and Peace and Cattle Shows.
  8. 8.0 8.1 8.2 Fire & Blood, The Lysene Spring and the End of Regency.
  9. 9.0 9.1 The World of Ice & Fire, The Targaryen Kings: Aegon III.